That's Why: not C9H13NO3

runners of all walks of life are often asked this one question by non-runners, which, while simple and only constructed of a few words, begs a thinking process tantamount to answering an Epistemology course exam question.   it's worse for ultrarunners as, to most pedestrian spectators, we're appearing to be half-assedly attempting suicide, or at least slightly deranged. 

"why do you run?"

simple, reasonable answers exist for this question.  
"i want to stay healthy." 
"i have to take a break from answering emails."
"because zombies."
 "i have to justify buying those adorable yoga pants that showcases my fantastic......intellect."
however,  few realize that the wide range of responses applicable to this question actually forms a bigger, more fundamental reason for why you run.  the problem is that this reason does not manifest itself through words but only appears as a mild sensation while you're running.  henceforth--the more tangible an answer becomes, the harder it is to put it into sentences.  

in this eleventy-bajillion part feature, I will attempt to put my spin into the runner's search for meaning.  as noted, the resulting draft of a runner's rambling manifesto will be guaranteed to DNF.  each post will connect to a previous post in some manner, forming a giant puzzle of indeterminate size and product.  however--i hope this sisyphean endeavor will help you find a more purposeful consciousness to your running regime.  enjoy.

Really Bad Running Advice: Urine Trouble

Dear Leo,

You recently mentioned the color swatch "'are you sure you're not a spectator' clear" in a race report.  Does this imply you have a color palette for checking your urine somewhere?  I've had trouble hydrating properly during past ultras so I'd like any help in being proactive with my fueling you can give me.  

Sincerely,

Splitzabeth Bonkerson


Splitzabeth,

Urine luck!  (OK I'll stop now.)

This handy chart is built on a 4x6 ratio in case you want to print it out and use it to check your pee during a race.   No, that won't look weird at all.  

Best of luck with your future races,

Leo

So That I Can Remember: Northover in July

Race Report: my first time.

(originally posted as a Facebook note on 15 July 2015.)


don't let the lack of a "dear penthouse forum" salutation fool you--this is indeed that kind of story. this is a story about how i started out all excited but without a clue about what i was doing.  this is a story about it was over way too fast, despite hours of boring rhythmic aerobic activity.  this is a story about how i just ended up insanely tired and hungry when i was done.  this is a story about my first 100 miler.